Shew...

I am admittedly and prematurely very nervous about my load tomorrow. I pick up near Richmond, VA and am heading into my home state of WV to deliver the load same day.
Sounds pleasant enough, right?

It's not. The route I have to take is going to be lovely... yet treacherous. It's all state routes through very winding hills and dales. It's going to be a real test of my trucking abilities. I learned to drive a truck with a 48 footer behind it on roads similar to what I will be driving on tomorrow. But not nearly as trying as a 53 footer. I'm nervous. But I will be fine. That's why I'm a "professional".

I will just transcribe my jitters into confidence and know that I will be just fine as long as I am smart and careful in every twist and turn. Take it slow and easy.

The crappy part is after I deliver, I will not make it all the way home before my hours run out. So I will have to be in WV but not home for one more night.

But this also works to my advantage. I will have to drive to get home on Friday morning, which means I will have worked that day. So my 4 days off don't officially start until Saturday.

And since I just made an appointment with a tattooist for Tuesday, this works out well.

I'm gonna get started on my sleeve finally. It's gonna be a long, expensive process. But I've been searching for an artist for a while now and this guy has not only displayed excellent original and custom artwork and has also been featured in a top rated tattoo magazine. So I am going to take the plunge. Woo hoo! Wish me luck! haha

Well I need to get going and grab some dinner and then maybe relax with a movie. I don't have to rush off anywhere in the morning, so I may be back online in the AM. If not, then it'll be sometime when I get home again. If you're lucky. haha

Toodles!

Just a couple things....

Just a couple things I wanna get off my chest and maybe start some constructive conversations on....

1) Why have fast food resturants started using those retarded-ass trash recepticles with small circular holes on the top instead of the wide-mouthed swinging door on the front?

I suspect it's because they don't want to fish around in the trash for tossed dine-in trays. But would rather spend their time trying to remove a heaped over trash bag without getting ketchup and half eaten french fries all over themselves.

These new trash recepticles piss me off. I liked the old method of "slide it all off into a trash can with the aid of the swinging door". I loathe having to perform the new "grab the corner of the advertisement/placemat paper while you attempt to slide off all the contents of your tray into an 8 inch hole and NOT get your food all over yourself" method . Seriously... bad idea.

2) WTF is wrong with people today when it comes to forming lines where lines are necessary?
Again I will use the fast food resturant scenario to explain my beef with this one.

I waltzed into a Micky D's the other day, which to my chagrin, was filled with the eldery type of humanoids that take tour busses to places and jam pack resturants along the way when it's their hourly feeding time.

But damnit, I wanted that milkshake.

So I attempted to find a line behind a cashier, to no avail. Everyone was just milling around, completely unorganized, hoping to be able to step up at the request of "I can help who's next please".

Seriously... what happend to single file lines, first come first serve, and all that orderly jazz? Things work better when there is a little orginaztion. And no, that's not just my inner virgo talking either!

This has become an issue for me over the past year or so, this unorganization of the human race. Of course, it's only displaying what humans, and American's, are becoming. Which is also rude and selfish.

So I found myself standing there, wondering when it will be my turn to step up to the cashier and place my order when it occurs to me... just jump in behind someone and say loudly...

"Is this one of the lines? I'm starved and it looks like most of these folks are just waiting for food."

It didn't take too long for a line to form behind both of the working cashiers. I laughed... and ended up ahead of most of the morons who'd be just hanging out hoping to be picked next for the dodgeball game we call...

Ordering an F'n meal!!!

Don't be a sheeple people... form a line, don't follow the crowd. If someone gets mad that you "jumped" explain that from chaos, you made order.. and that you'll be happy to place yours and get out of their way.

Quickie...

I'm currently on a load that just pisses me off and will throw me all off schedule for at least a couple of days. Today was normal enough. Up at dawn, retrieve load, head northwesterly bound. I've stopped close to the TN/KY border for the night.

I will get up way before the sun does in the morning to head up to Daleville, IN (north of Indy) to take another 10 hr. break tomorrow by 10am-ish. I will have to get some sleep while I'm there since I have to be up again by 9pm to drive the rest of the way to my delivery point about 30 minutes from the truck stop I'll be breaking at. This load is retarded... it delivers at 10:15 PM tomorrow night and has an estimated unload time of 6 hours. Apparently I'm to be expected to unload it myself.

Which, I'm sorry... is soooo not happening. I might consider it if someone is willing to show me the ropes for the first pallet or two. But if there is a lumper (a person who you can pay to unload for you) available, you can bet your sweet pickles I'll be hiring him/her.

Then, I've already told my manager that I will be returning to the truck stop to recover and regroup until further notice. I kinda need a chance to recoup some hours for my workweek anyway, plus I'll be a dang zombie from the sleeping schedule change and need a day to get back on track.

So there... that's my blog. I'm going to go watch a movie I just bought... Reno 911! the Movie. I've heard it's helarious but haven't seen it yet. So I am gonna lay here and laugh myself silly then go to sleep. 3am comes quickly....

A Blog

After my previous cleverly titled blog, I figured I'd go with something a little more simple.

After the ado of the penis monster, the rest of my journey has been fairly pleasant. I stopped the other night at a Flying-J truck stop in Texarkana, Arkansas and enjoyed a free meal in the "Cookery".

I was all prepared to pay about what... $10 or so for a dinner. I settled down, got my water with lemon and placed my order. After nearly 40 minutes my meal finally arrived. The place was relatively dead, so you can imagine my annoyance at having to wait so long. Not to mention the fact that the waitress that took my order never once came to tell me was sorry it was taking so long. Actually it seemed like she was intentionally avoiding my booth.. but that might've just been my own paranoia.

I was just finishing the last of the water and grabbing my purse to leave in a huff when the waitress finally presented me with my meal. Little did I know that all the while the check out clerk had been watching my progressing irritation and when I was done with my meal and ready to check out she took my bill and said, "hold on a sec". And disappeared into the kitchen area.

More waiting... but this time only a couple minutes before I saw her again and she waved me on and said to have a good evening. Free meal. woo hoo. So I took that $10 I was going to spend on the meal and bought myself a new movie. I picked up "The Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy" on DVD... one of my favorite books of all time, which was made into a movie back a few years ago. I have to say that it is one of my top favorites of all time in both the book and movie categories. For the movie it was probably because they stuck to the book very closely and that therefore made it a very enjoyable film. I watched it that night. It made me laugh and smile lots.

The following morning I was in the "J" using the powder room to start my day... morning elimination and tooth brushing sort of stuff when I gal came in and started getting her day going as well. I made the comment about how "fun" it was to get primped for your day in a public restroom all the time. She laughed and agreed.

I realized after a moment that I'd seen her in the resturant the previous evening (when I was eating my free steak) and so mentioned as much to her. I told her I noticed her the night before because she had on a pirate t-shirt.

She then turned to study me full on... and asked the sort of question you don't generally get asked in a public restroom far far away from home...

"Would your name happen to be Gi-Gi?"

"Well, it is one name I go by, yes...." I replied...a little sheepishly.

Of course she then went on to introduce herself as a fellow trucker and blogger who frequents this very blog and we shook hands... in a public restroom! hahahaha If I'd had known who she was the night before we could've enjoyed a meal together talking of our journeys and other trucker stuff. Perhaps another time! So here's a quick shout out to The One and Only GyspyTrucker! Holla Girl!

Well... after that it was off to the races.... or at least the races that consist of driving in Texas in a company truck with a governed speed of 60 MPH. I delivered my load on the south side of Houston and then headed up to our SNI terminal on the east side for my break.

While I was there I chatted with other drivers and hung out waiting for my dear friends Oscar and Alison to come get me to hang out for the evening. They live just east of Houston. We had a great visit, which ended up being an overnighter. They took me out for Chinese and then we went back to their place to just catch up and hang out. Of course I wish I could've stayed longer. But alas... I had to keep on truckin'.

This morning I got back to my truck around 7 am CST and found my next assignment waiting for me on the Qualcomm. I was to pick up a load on the south side of Houston and head to Savannah, GA with it. I made it as far as Gulfport, MS tonight. Tomorrow I'll be taking a short tour to make a stop over in the Eglin AFB area of the Florida Panhandle to visit some of my most awesomest friends for the day. I'm so excited!

I just talked to them on the phone and they're as excited as I am too! It's gonna rock. We haven't seen each other since I think 2003... actually it was on my way home to Nebraska from a week vacation visiting them in Alabama that I had a bad car wreck which totalled my most awesome Mazda, taught me the value of seatbelts and airbags and slightly damaged my ego. But I digress... I'm so excited I don't know how I will sleep tonite! woo hoo!

Well that's it for now, I'm going to go try to unwind and get some rest before my big day tomorrow! Toodloo!

Penis...

Yes my friends... I just titled my blog after the male reproductive organ.

Why?

Because I can. And because it's part of what I'm going to blog about today.

Yesterday I was enjoying a lovely drive down US-67 through the State of Misery...er Missouri. It was hit or miss rain most of the morning but as the afternoon hours came to pass the sun came out and made for a lovely drive.

I was about an hour and a half away from my decided destination for the night on the MO - AR state line when it happened. I was passed by an ordinary Isuzu pick-up truck, complete with Bond-O and rust spots (as an Isuzu pickup is sure to have these days). Nothing attention grabbing, just a bucket of rust cruising down the road.

And then the driver had begun to shift a little in the drivers seat and then slowly began to decelerate. My initial thought..'Cel phone rang, it was on his belt or in his pocket and the conversation and new distraction had his foot forgetting about the gas pedal'.

Boy was I wrong.

He slowed down, honked his horn, apparently desperate for my attention. I thought maybe he needed help or was going to point out a flaw in my truck for me. But no... when I looked over, to my great disappointment and disgust, all I could see was his pants around his knees and his hand working very laboriously on his member. Penis.

Damnit guys! Seriously. I've had a conversation with many of my male friends on this subject to try to get some idea as to why this happens. I want to say that I am happy you feel comfortable enough to masturbate in your car driving down the road. Good for you. Stroke it like you mean it! But please, just leave me (and anyone else for that matter) out of it. I certainly don't want to see you spanking the monkey. My reasons are as follows:

1) I think it's just rude and disgusting. What if I were a real "mother trucker" who had my young child in the truck with me and it was he/she that saw you doing this as opposed to me? Would you be ashamed? Probably not you sick f%ck.

2) The blatant disregard for safety really pisses me off. First you're distracting yourself from the driving you're supposed to be doing. Second, you're distracting me from the driving I'm supposed to be doing. Third, any other party that has been subjected to your vile ways has also become distracted. Therefore giving the statistics folks a very high number for the possibility of an unfortunate incident/accident.

3) I don't like sharing in your "private moment" while I'm working either. I'm not driving down the road for "pleasure" but for "business" and not the kind of business that involves pleasuring myself. I want to be able to do my job, safely and efficiently and without incident.

I have decided that I'm going to keep a disposable camera in my door compartment or my overhead compartment that will be within easy reach for future "weenie waggers". I will first snap a picture of the idiot wacking away in the drivers seat... then I will snap a picture of his license plate. Then I will mail the camera with a written statement about when and where it took place. Maybe the cops can do something to crack down on the sicko's who want to expose themselves.

I was talking with my sweetie about this latest incident and we came to the conclusion that maybe if they think they can get in trouble with the law they'll stop being pervs'.

I don't mind trying to test this theory. I have though about also making a hand written sign to hold up for the next one... because yes there will be more... that say's "I have your license plate number and I'm calling 9-1-1."

I will do it too.

This time around all I did was shake my head in disgust and then nonchelantly "drifted" over towards his lane, which prompted him to pull over onto the shoulder and stop. Hopefully he was putting things back in their proper places...

Well anywho. It's getting late and I want to relax a little before I hit the hay.

Stay safe and enjoy life... and watch out for exposed penises!